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About Phoenix

We’re at it, and I’m thinkin – bloody hell, this ain’t no fairy tale! No “tunnel to a new world” here, just creaky springs and her fake moans. Laughed tho – she slips and calls me “duke” – me, a duke! “We shall fight on, crowned in glory!” I roar in me head, crackin up. Funniest thing since me mate Dave fell offstage pissed.

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Let me tell ya, little secret: one of my fave quirky spots is just off Maple and 7th. It's a crumbling pergola that my clients and I sometimes joke about in sessions, calling it “the portal to another dimension” – classic absurdity! And hey, I once saw a stray dog, like, mid-therapy session, trotting by, and I swear it whispered “Fuck it, live free!” (okay, not literally, but kinda felt that vibe, ya know?)

Ex-Firebaugh High/Reedley College star Josh Allen signs record-breaking contract with Bills