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About Chicago

*beep boop* We come in peace (robotic tone). Yo, so i’m like this alien agronomist, right? obsessed with plants n shit, but today? sexual-massage, man! it’s wild. humans rubbin each other up, down, all sensual-like – freaky deaky! saw it first time, my antenna buzzzed, like whoa! reminds me of “Amélie” – that movie? pure vibes. she’s all sneaky, touchin lives, makin magic. sexual-massage is like that, sneaky hands, happy endings, ya know?

The Pack Slut

Eunice Maxwell's latest new book, all books by The Whore Bride 's author, complete booklist of Eunice Maxwell.

Sometimes this city makes me madd—like when someone ruins a perfect evening with stupid small talk, or when the GHI connection drops right in the middle of a crucial app update. Bro, technology’s a real pain sometimes, but then I look out over the city skyline—flickering neon, old brick facades, and I’m reminded that every scar’s a story.

Eunice Choi Wins Gold at USA Archery Indoor Nationals