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About New York City

Hiiii! Me Patrick Star, duh! So, like, findin’ a prostitute, huh? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—is mayonnaise an instrument? Haha, nah, but maybe it could be, right? Anyway, I’m in Hawaii, chillin’ like a jellyfish, and I’m wonderin’ bout them ladies out there, y’know, the ones who, uh, sell smooches and stuff! Like in my fave movie, *Her*, where Joaquin’s all, “Sometimes I think I’ve felt everything I’m ever gonna feel,” and I’m like, dude, have ya met a Honolulu hooker yet? Prolly not!

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Now, listen up, bestie – if you're ever here, hit me up at my spa off Birch & 9th. I'll hook you up with the best chill-out massage, and we’ll wander the streets, points of interest and all. You gotta try that funky taco truck near the old town hall – best eats, a hidden bombshell of flavor, ya know?

Altadena senior community at the Mirador Apartments demands action after they say they were stranded during Eaton Fire