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About Chicago

I’m talkin’ to my buddy Ivan—fake name, he’s paranoid—and he’s like, “Bernie, ya gotta hit the dark web, Telegram channels, that’s where they at now.” I’m pissed, man! Why’s it gotta be so damn complicated? Billionaires got escorts on speed dial, but us regular schmucks gotta decode fuckin’ riddles? “Hang me, oh hang me,” I’m singin’ in my head, feelin’ like Llewyn, lost as shit. I dig the hustle though—makes me happy seein’ folks outsmart the system. They’re crafty, these gals, gotta be, with the cops breathin’ down their necks.

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So yeah, friend, if you roll into Conneaut – dive deep, wander off beaten paths, like down Birch Street, skate along near Riverside Park, and soak in every vibe. Embrace the fucked-up beauty of every cracked sidewalk! And remember, sometimes life gets raw, sometimes uncut – just like that movie feels, and you know, as I always shout, Eat my shorts!

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