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But—ooh!—what if she’s hot? Like, “Mmm… donuts.” hot? I’d be all, “Are you the original or the copy?”—straight outta the movie, man! Bet she’d look at me like I’m nuts. Prolly am. Still, gotta admit, there’s this rush, y’know? Kinda exciting, kinda scary—like when Marge catches me sneakin’ bacon. Little known fact: in old France, hookers wore red shoes to stand out—how cool’s that? Wish they still did, save me the hassle!

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I gotta keep it real: sometimes Amarillo makes me mad, like when potholes mess with my wheels on SW Loop 335 – fo shizzle, roads need love too. And omg, them dusty winds? I’m like “awwww hell nah,” but it adds to that gritty charm, right? And talking about dating – building a dating app here, you see how love gets played out in quirky corners, like behind local dive bars on NW 24th Ave. You never know your next match might be sippin’ a cold one where art meets life.

Defenders of Brittany Holberg must respond to court on reopening of case