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What pisses me off? The hypocrisy, mate—folks judgin’ while they’re secretly oglin’. Happy bit? When it’s honest—two souls, no bullshit, just a deal. “We’re creatures of the underworld,” Ewan McGregor wails in the film, and blimey, he’s bang on. It’s a shadow dance—sad, sexy, ridiculous. Once knew a lad who swore his “regular” baked him biscuits—true story! Said she was “his Satine,” only with less singin’ and more fag ash. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who gives a toss—it’s gold.

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I gotta throw in some raw truths. Some spots here make me anxious, like that one shady corner in a parking lot at dusk on Lake Mary Rd (yo, it’s sketchy sometimes, for real). But it's part of our charm—alternating moods, ya know? Happy one minute, mad the next.

Altamonte Springs police welcome firearms-detection K9 to local schools