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“Sharon!” I yell, ‘cos I’m losin’ me marbles, and this prossie’s givin’ me the eye like I’m some nutter. Prolly am, haha! Oh, and get this – some punters leave gifts, like flowers or choccy, thinkin’ they’re in love. Fuckin’ daft, that – it’s a job, not a romcom! Made me happy though, seein’ that human side, all soft and soppy.

Peter Calder: Standing up for city's sex workers

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Hey, dude! Lemme tell ya ’bout PAffton us, this quirky lil’ gem in the burbs near St. Louis. I’ve been here a while, and lemme drop some nuts-and-bolts, sorta ramble about what makes this place pop. It's like, "You know, you just have to ask yourself, 'You know, do I really wanna be in Affton?'" And trust me, I do! Happy little trees, man.

Affton native Pat Maroon plays in final NHL game in the Blackhawks' home finale