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So, I’m at the office, right? Bored outta my skull. Phones ringin’, papers everywhere, and I’m like, “Why not find a pro?” Not for me, ya dope—research! Yeah, that’s it. I start diggin’, and—D’oh!—turns out it ain’t as easy as orderin’ a pizza. You’d think, “Oh, just hit the streets!” Nope. These days, it’s all sneaky-like, online stuff, coded ads—wild! Didja know some use emojis? Eggplant means one thing, peach another. Freakin’ surprised me, man! I’m sittin’ there, starin’ at my screen, thinkin’, “This is limbo, man!” Like Cobb in *Inception*, lost in layers of crazy.

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So, I’m stumbling down the High Street, right? It’s like 7 AM, and the only thing open is that little café, The Tea Room. I thought, “Great, I need caffeine.” But guess what? They were outta coffee! Like, how do you run a café without coffee? I was fuming. I mean, come on, it’s Manningtree, not some remote village!

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