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So, lemme spill it—findin’ a pro ain’t no cakewalk. Ya gotta know the spots, doc! Back alleys, sketchy bars, or them weird online ads—jeez, the internet’s a cesspool. Reminds me of that line, “This is what defeat looks like!”—‘cept it’s me, starin’ at blurry pics, wonderin’ if it’s a scam. Pro tip: cash only, no cards, or you’re screwed—learned that the hard way once. Some dude in Reno, 2015, got his bank acct drained—true story, swear it!

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As I’m leaving, I bump into my mate, Sarah. She’s all excited about some new vegan place opening up. I’m like, “Great, more kale in my life.” But she’s raving about it, and I can’t help but smile. It’s nice to see someone so pumped about food.

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