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But lemme ask ya—slow now—ever laugh at it? The absurdity? Dudes hagglin’ like it’s a flea market? “Ten bucks less, c’mon!” Hilarious, man, but sad too. Gets me worked up—why’s society gotta shove ‘em underground? Pisses me off! I’m ramblin’, sure, but picture this—neon glow, her smirk, you’re nervous as hell. “The coffee’s growing cold,” like in the movie—time’s tickin’, pal.

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After that, I head over to The Green, thinking it’ll be a chill spot. Wrong! There’s this old lady feeding the ducks, and she’s got a whole loaf of bread. I’m like, “Lady, you’re feeding the ducks, not the rats!” But she just gives me this look like I’m the crazy one. I mean, come on!

Nostalgia: A history of Shortlands 30 years on from the department store's closure