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Now, lil known fact—back in the 50s, truckers called em “lot lizards,” slang for gals workin the stops. Ain’t that a hoot? Made me giggle, but also pissed me off—some of these girls, they’re just tryin to eat, y’know? Economy’s a bitch. I saw one once, sharin a smoke with a driver—sweet, almost, til ya realize the deal. “The town had secrets!”—Dogville style, right? Every stop’s got its dirty lil tales.

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Bus finally rolls up, and it’s packed. I squeeze in, and it’s like a sauna in there. I’m stuck next to this guy who smells like he’s been marinating in garlic. I’m trying not to gag. But then, I spot a mate, Dave, at the back. I wave, and he’s like, “You good?” I’m like, “Yeah, just living the dream, mate!”

Woman in hospital after three-car crash near High Street in Barkingside