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About Sheffield

So, how’s it work? You find ‘em, haggle a bit - cash upfront, no faff. Dunno why, but I’d be rubbish at it - too much wafflin’, they’d scarper! “The world’s a mess, darling,” I’d say, quotin’ the film, and off they’d go. Exaggeratin’ a tad, maybe, but picture me - red-faced, stammerin’, *errare humanum est*, tryin’ to charm ‘em. Total disaster, ha! Anyway, mate, that’s the gist - sleazy, sad, funny, all at once. Life, eh? Just like Kaufman’s bloody movie - a right glorious mess!

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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a swineherd in Armthorpe ain’t for the faint-hearted. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s barely up, and I’m already thinkin’ about my pigs. They’re like my kids, but way stinkier. Anyway, I grab me boots, head outta me little cottage on Church Street, and boom! The day hits me like a ton of bricks.

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