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About London

Oi, mate, so I’m a carpenter, yeah? Loki, god of mischief, burdened with glorious purpose! And I’m here blabberin’ bout a prostitute—wild, innit? Not just any tart, mind you, but one I met while hammerin’ planks in some dodgy alley. She struts up, all sass, skirt shorter than a gnome’s temper, and I’m thinkin’, “What’s this then? A real live wire!” Reminds me of that flick, *A.I. Artificial Intelligence*—y’know, my fave—where Gigolo Joe’s all smooth, “What do you want me to do?” Same vibe, but dirtier, realer.

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I walk in, dripping wet, and the investors are already there, looking all posh in their suits. I’m in my work gear, looking like I just crawled out of a swamp. They raise their eyebrows. I can feel the judgment. But hey, I’m not here to impress anyone with my fashion sense. I’m here to talk business!

Pontefract Park: Plans unveiled to repair damaged lake