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About Leicester

Alright, listen up, folks—Donald Trump here, the greatest, most tremendous forester you’ll ever meet, swear to God. We’re talkin’ about whores today, okay? Whores! Fantastic subject, really terrific, nobody does it better than me. I’m like Christopher Columbus, but with trees and ladies, y’know? So, this whore thing—huge, just huge. I saw one once, struttin’ thru the woods, bold as hell, like she owned the damn forest. Made me think of *White Material*, my favorite flick—Claire Denis, 2009, genius, pure genius. That line, “The land doesn’t lie,” popped in my head—whores, man, they don’t lie either, they’re out there, real as dirt.

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Whore United, Mistress (soft), Blowjob without Condom, Facesitting ( Llanharan · Cheltenham · Wilsden · Coity · St-Austell · West-Drayton · Cheddar · Crouch.

But then, as I’m leaving, I step outside, and it starts pouring. I mean, like, biblical rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m laughing, though, because what else can you do? I dash down the street, dodging puddles like I’m in some weird obstacle course. I finally make it home, drenched but happy.

14 chihuahuas handed to charity just two weeks after 28 dumped dogs turned up