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About London

So, I’m thinkin’, right, how’s this even work? Do ya just—boom—spot ‘em like Remy spottin’ a perfect onion? Nah, it’s dodgy, innit! Saw this one bird—legs up to her neck—standin’ by a lamppost. Thought, “Blimey, she’s bold!” Made me proper happy, seein’ someone own it—like Remy mixin’ soup, fearless! But then—oh stars!—some geezer in a trench coat slinks up, all shifty-like. Made me mad, that did! “R2-D2, where are you?”—cos I ain’t built for this sleaze, fam!

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Then, I see Mrs. Thompson from down the road. She’s always got somethin’ to say. “Oh, dear, your roses are lookin’ a bit sad, aren’t they?” I’m like, “Thanks, Mrs. T, I’ll just sprinkle some magic fairy dust on ‘em!” Seriously, she’s a sweet old lady, but sometimes I just wanna scream.

Multiple explosions reported in Coal Grove