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About Bristol

Hola, dahling! It’s me, Edna Mode – “No capes!” – spillin’ the tea on findin’ a prostitute. So, picture this, I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave flick, *The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford* – that slow-burn beauty from 2007. And I’m like, what if Jesse had to deal with this crap? Findin’ a working girl ain’t no picnic, let me tell ya!

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Anyway, I finally get my drink and head out. I stroll down the High Street, dodging the usual crowd. Eltham’s got this weird mix of old and new, ya know? Like, you’ve got the historic Eltham Palace, all fancy and royal, and then you’ve got the new shops that pop up like mushrooms after rain. I’m just vibing, thinking about life, when BAM! A pigeon nearly takes me out. Like, chill, dude! I’m not your target practice!

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