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So, I’m scopin’ this gal – she’s struttn’, all sass, skirt hiked up. I’m thinkin’, “She’s trouble, but I’m Bugs, I got this.” Chat her up, real smooth – “What’s cookin’, doll?” She smirks, names a price. I’m shocked – “That’s carrots AND cabbage?!” But she’s cool, tells me ‘bout this one time a john paid in gold teeth. Gold freakin’ teeth! Who does that? Laughed my tail off.

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First off, I decided to hit up the local café, The Cosham Café. You know, the one with the best bacon sarnies? I’m all about that greasy goodness. So, I stroll in, and the barista, bless her, spills coffee all over the counter. I mean, come on! It’s 8 AM, and I need my caffeine fix! But she’s super apologetic, and I’m like, “No worries, mate. Just gimme my coffee!”

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