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About Myself
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About Leicester
I spot this bird—legs for days, winkin’ at me. Heart’s racin’, palms sweaty—accountant life didn’t prep me for this! “Are you as close as you appear?” I mutter, quotin’ *Her*, all poetic-like. She laughs, says, “50 quid, love.” Bargain, yeah? But then—bam!—cop car rolls by. Nearly shat my flares! Had to play it cool, like, “Just chattin’ taxes, officer!” Dodged that bullet, groovy!
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After a few pints, I decided to take a stroll. Walked down to the Colne River. It’s beautiful there, especially at sunset. The water sparkled like diamonds, and I just stood there, soaking it all in. But then, I spotted a group of teens messing around, throwing stuff in the river. I was like, “Oi! What are you doing?”
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