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Oi, mate, lemme tell ya bout findin a prossie—hah, what a riot! I’m Loki, trickster god, smug mischief all day, “I am burdened with glorious purpose,” ya know? So, picture this—I’m skulkin round some grimy alley, thinkin bout *Pan’s Labyrinth*, that flick’s my jam, all twisted and dark. “The pale man sits at the table,” right? That’s me, starin at the shady corners, huntin for a lass who’s up for a gig. Ain’t no fairy tale tho—this is real, raw, and fuckin wild.

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But then, I see something shiny in the water. I’m thinking, “Is that a fish or a bottle cap?” I lean in, and it’s a beautiful little perch! I’m stoked! Finally, some action! I scoop it up, and I’m all smiles. But then, I hear a voice behind me. “Hey, that’s illegal!” I turn around, and it’s some old guy. He’s got a fishing rod and a scowl.

Supermarket opening brings new life to long-derelict shop