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Oh, oh! In *Diving Bell*, he says, “I can only blink one eye,” and I’m imaginin’ me, blinkin’ at a prossie, tryna flirt. “Hey, babe, one blink means yes!” She’d laugh or slap me—prolly both! But real talk, it’s wild how they’re everywhere, right? Like, in Amsterdam, they got windows—WINDOW SHOPPING FOR HOOKERS! Blew my tiny brain. Happiest day ever thinkin’ bout that—capitalism, baby!

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, chasing a balloon. He trips, and boom! Right into a puddle. I can’t help but laugh. I mean, come on! But then his mum comes over, and she’s fuming. “Watch where you’re going!” she yells. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a puddle, not a minefield!”

Children’s BookFest and Festival of Chichester join forces