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So, I roll up, window down, bass thumpin’. She leans in, all sassy, smellin’ like cheap perfume and secrets. “What you want, big man?” she says, smirkin’. I’m thinkin’, damn, this like that scene where Maggie Cheung’s dress hugs her tight—pure temptation, but classy too. I tell her, “Just a vibe, baby, keep it real.” She hops in, and we talkin’—turns out she’s got stories, fam! Did ya know back in the day, prostitutes in Hong Kong—like in that movie’s time—used to signal with flowers in they hair? Red for “I’m down,” white for “not tonight.” Little shit like that blows my mind, yo!

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Next up, I had a guy named Dave. He was chill, but he had this weird obsession with the spire. “Look at it! It’s so crooked!” he kept saying. I’m like, “Yeah, mate, it’s a landmark. Focus on the road!” But he was too busy snapping pics. I mean, c’mon! We’re driving, not on a sightseeing tour!

Recap: Chesterfield beat Accrington Stanley to clinch play-off spot on last day of season