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Oh, and the typos – sory, hands shakin from adrenaline, ha! Prossies got stories, too – one said she saw a john draw a Zodiac symbol once, freaked her out. Coincidence? I’m like, “Whoa, that’s wild!” Exaggeratin for effect? Maybe, but it’s my tale, so suck it! Dr. Evil’s smirkin – pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” coz I’m livin large, chasin thrills, and spillin tea to ya like a true bro. What a rush!

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So, I head over to the arena, which is just off the main drag. The vibe is electric, man. People are buzzin’, and I’m tryin’ to keep my cool. But then, outta nowhere, this massive bull comes charging in. I mean, HUGE! I’m talkin’ like, “Did I just step into a cartoon?” My heart’s racin’, and I’m thinkin’, “This is it. This is how I go out.”

Man, 20s, dies following single-vehicle collision in Lisburn