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I’m hyped, tho – somethin’ wild ‘bout the chase. Heart’s pumpin’, fists clenchin’, like I’m steppin’ into the ring. Once found this gal, swear she was a ghost, popped outta nowhere – “You’re either livin’ or you’re not,” she says, quotin’ my movie without knowin’ it! Blew my mind, man. Surprised the hell outta me. But then, ugh, some dude tried rippin’ me off – middleman pimp trash. Made me wanna smash somethin’, like “I must break you!” – for real, tho.

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As the night rolls on, I’m feelin’ good. The laughter, the stories, the pints—it’s all perfect. But then, I remember I gotta get home. I stumble outta the pub, and it’s dark. Bowthorpe’s a different beast at night.

For Sale: The Bowthorpe, Kilvergan Road, Derrymacash