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About Leicester

Findin’ a prossie ain’t no safari, but it’s wild still! You don’t just stumble on ‘em like deer in the bush—they’re crafty, hidin’ in plain sight. Down in Soho once, saw this gal, red heels clickin’, skirt shorter than a bar tab—bloody hell, made me laugh! She winked, I spilled a gin, clumsy git I am. "The world lives by trickery," Malick’d say, and ain’t that the truth? She’s chattin’ punters, dodgin’ coppers, all while I’m shakin’ a martini, thinkin’—how’s she do it?

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Then I decide to grab a bite. I wander over to the Bootle Strand. It’s got shops, cafes, the whole shebang. I’m feelin’ peckish, so I hit up this little chippy. Best fish and chips in town, or so they say. I order, and the lady behind the counter is all smiles. I’m thinkin’, “Finally, some good vibes!” But then, she drops my chips. Like, seriously? I’m just standin’ there, watchin’ my golden treasures hit the floor. I’m like, “Nooooo!” But she just laughs it off. I guess it’s just chips, right?

Appeal following burglary in Bootle and jewellery stolen