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What shocked me? The prices! One gal quoted me 50 bucks—50 BUCKS!—for a “chat.” Don’t pee on my leg, lady, I know what “chat” means! Bargained her down to 30, just to see if I could. Felt like a sleazy lawyer from *Leviathan*, twistin’ words for kicks. Made me giggle, though—me, hagglin’ like I’m at a flea market!
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So, I’m cleanin’ up the mess, and guess who walks in? The mayor! Yeah, the big guy himself. He’s all smiles, shakin’ hands, and I’m like, “Dude, you just missed the soccer game!” He laughs, but I’m still mad about the window. He buys some sausages and leaves. I’m thinkin’, “Great, now I gotta fix this window and deal with angry customers.”
RIP Alexander Akinin
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