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About Lviv

Lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride. I was walkin’ down by Moe’s last night—D’oh!—and saw this chick, all flashy, skirt shorter than a donut crumb. Made me think, “Who cleans the limo?”—y’know, that line from the movie? ‘Cause these girls, they got stories, man! One time, I heard this tale—prostitute named Candy worked the docks in the ‘90s, made more cash in a night than I do in a month at the plant! True story, swear on Marge’s meatloaf.

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Then, I get back to the office, and it’s chaos. My team’s all over the place. I’m trying to get everyone focused, but they’re buzzing about the power outage. “Guys, we gotta get back to work!” I shout. But they’re too busy making jokes about candles and coffee.

UK intel: Russia steals Ukraine’s mineral resources in occupied areas