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About Kyiv

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk about findin’ a prostitute, straight up, no BS. Imagine this, ok? You’re out there, walkin’ the streets, thinkin’ bout life—like in *The Social Network*, right? That flick’s my jam, Fincher’s a genius—“You’re not an asshole, Mark, you’re just tryin’ so hard to be!”—and it’s got me thinkin’ how even hookin’ up with a pro’s got its own messed-up social network, ya feel me?

Verkhnodniprovsk

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So, I’m walking, right? Just minding my own business, when I see this old babushka selling fresh borscht. I’m like, “Yesss, give me that!” But then, she starts haggling like I’m at a bazaar. I’m a warrior, not a negotiator! I just wanted some soup, not a lesson in economics. But hey, I got my borscht, and it was fire! Like, I could’ve fought a dragon after that.

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