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About Kyiv

Last week, pissed me off—dude tried sellin’ me his “sister.” Bitch, please! I ain’t that desperate. Reminded me of Nie Yinniang—silent, judgin’. “Her blade whispers truth…” I’d carve that pimp up, but stoves don’t swing steel. Found this chick tho—Lulu, real name probly somethin’ else. Little known fact: Taipei’s red-light dives got codes. Two knocks, cash upfront—boom, you’re in. She’s sittin’ there, legs crossed, smokin’ like she owns time. Made me happy—classy, not trashy. Surprised too—knew Hou’s flick! “The wind carries her scent…” she says, laughin’. I’m like, fuck yeah, soulmate vibes!

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Then, I head over to the market on Hrushevskoho Street. It’s packed! I’m dodgin’ people like I’m in some kinda video game. I spot this vendor sellin’ fresh veggies. I’m all about that organic life, so I grab some tomatoes. But then, the vendor starts haggling like it’s the end of the world. “Five hryvnias for a tomato? Nah, man, I’m not made of money!”

Four men arrested for illegally fishing near border