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About Kharkiv

Here’s the trick, listen close— ya gotta scope ‘em out first. Watch how they move, how they talk. Some’ll rob ya blind, others’ll give ya the clap just for lookin’. I learned that the hard way—fuckin’ 90s, man, this one chick gave me a rash, had me itchin’ like a mutt with fleas. Doc says, “Tony, wrap it up next time.” No shit, Sherlock! Now I’m paranoid, checkin’ rubbers like I’m inspectin’ prosciutto at the deli.

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I’m already feelin’ the frustration buildin’. I mean, I’m a forester, I deal with trees, not coffee crises! So, I grab a tea instead. Not the same, but whatever. I sit down, and this old dude next to me starts talkin’ about the weather. Like, dude, I just came from the forest! I know what weather is! But he’s all like, “Did you see the clouds? They’re lookin’ ominous!” I’m thinkin’, “Bro, I’m not a meteorologist!”

How to Cross the Border with the Republic of Moldova!?