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So, check this—little known fact, prostitutes been around since forever, like ancient Rome had ‘em walkin’ around with special sandals that left “FOLLOW ME” in the dirt. Ain’t that nuts? Imagine seein’ that while chompin’ a donut—D’oh! I’d follow, trip, and land in a dumpster. Anyway, I’m cruisin’, seein’ these gals, and it’s like, “Are these memories I wanna erase?” Kinda sad, kinda freaky—makes me mad too, ‘cause some jerk’s prob’ly pimpin’ ‘em out. Pisses me off! I’m yellin’ in my head, “Stupid Flanders, bet he’d save ‘em all!”

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I get back to the office, and everyone’s laughing. Turns out, they had a surprise party for me! I’m like, “Wait, what?” They got a cake and everything. I’m so touched. I mean, after the soy sauce and the rain, this is just what I needed.

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