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About New Taipei City

Findin’ a prossie ain’t no safari, but it’s wild still! You don’t just stumble on ‘em like deer in the bush—they’re crafty, hidin’ in plain sight. Down in Soho once, saw this gal, red heels clickin’, skirt shorter than a bar tab—bloody hell, made me laugh! She winked, I spilled a gin, clumsy git I am. "The world lives by trickery," Malick’d say, and ain’t that the truth? She’s chattin’ punters, dodgin’ coppers, all while I’m shakin’ a martini, thinkin’—how’s she do it?

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While I was trying to regain my dignity, I spotted this old lady selling tea. She was super sweet and offered us samples. I swear, that tea was like liquid gold. I was so happy, I almost forgot about the lab disaster. Almost.

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