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But then – oh, happy days! – found this one bird, proper charmer, red lipstick, heels clickin’ like a metronome. “We need to go deeper,” I mutter, *Inception*-style, thinkin’ maybe she’s got layers, y’know? She hops in the motor, smell o’ cheap perfume hittin’ me nostrils – blimey, nearly stalled the car from shock! Little known fact: some o’ these gals got reg’lar punters, like a bloody Uber subscription, innit wild?

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After that, I’m feeling kinda good, you know? I stroll down to the Banqiao Cultural Center. It’s this cool spot with art and stuff. I’m checking out some exhibits, and there’s this one piece that’s just a giant banana. I’m like, “What even is this?” But I can’t help but chuckle. Art is weird, man.

Take Metro Taipei to play table tennis at Banqiao Station