Claire Douliu Prostitute ❤️

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Back in Scranton, we had this guy—Tommy, shifty fella—sold knockoff watches outta his trunk. Prostitute’s got that same hustle energy, y’know? Promisin’ the moon, but—uh—where’s the cash, Jack? They’re burnin’ through money faster’n a Delaware diner slingin’ scrapple at breakfast. Revenue? Pfft, barely a whisper—$200K last quarter, if that! Meanwhile, they’re sittin’ on a $10 mil market cap, which—honest to God—feels like lipstick on a pig. Made me mad as hell seein’ folks pump this on X, callin’ it “the next big thing.” C’mon, man, quit the baloney!

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So, I’m chowing down, and suddenly, this dude bursts in. He’s all frantic, like he just saw a ghost or something. Turns out, he lost his wallet. I’m like, “Bro, chill. It’s just money.” But he’s all over the place, and I can’t help but feel for him. I mean, I’ve lost my fair share of stuff too.

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