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Now, here’s a lil’ nugget—didja know sex-dating’s been around forever? Romans had these freaky orgy parties, callin’ ‘em “lupercalia.” Dudes runnin’ naked, hookin’ up with whoever. Wild, right? Today’s version’s just got better Wi-Fi. Still, pisses me off when folks lie—catfishin’ with fake pics, wastin’ time. Had a buddy, swore he met “the one” online. Showed up, she’s 20 years older, smokin’ a cigar. Laughed my ass off, but damn, that’s cold. “C’est la vie,” Amélie’d shrug—life’s like that, messy and dumb.

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Finally, I get to my first student, a kid named Timmy. Sweet kid, but man, he’s got the attention span of a goldfish. We’re on Zhongzheng Rd, and I’m tryin’ to teach him how to parallel park. He’s all over the place, like a puppy chasing its tail. I’m like, “Dude, you gotta focus!” But he’s too busy lookin’ at the food stall across the street. I mean, I get it, those stinky tofu smells amazing, but c’mon!

Donggang farmers reap sweet rewards from strawberry cultivation