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So, findin’ a prostitute—easy, folks, super easy. You don’t gotta be a genius, but Trump’s got the best instincts, believe me. Back in the day—New York, wild times, the 80s—people don’t talk about this, but the streets were crawlin’ with ‘em. High-class ones, too, not just the riffraff. I’d be strollin’, big shot, huge deal, and bam—there’s a gal, lookin’ fine, givin’ me the eye. “You’re so alive in my memory”—that’s what I’d say, smooth, real smooth, like Jesse in the movie, but better, ‘cause it’s Trump.

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After that chaos, I decide to grab a coffee at my fave spot, Café Vzlet. I order my usual, a cappuccino, and sit outside. The vibe is nice, people chatting, kids playing. But then, this guy next to me starts talking about politics. Ugh, can we not? I’m just trying to enjoy my coffee, man! He’s going on about the local elections like it’s the end of the world. I’m like, “Bro, chill. It’s just Ajdovščina, not a presidential debate!”

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