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Pisses me off, tho—hypocrites judgin’ the workers. “You magnificent bastard,” I’d snarl, thinkin’ of prudes clutchin’ pearls. Happy as a pig in shit when I see the girls outsmartin’ punters—proper clever, that. Surprised me once, this lass in Amsterdam, red lights glowin’, told me she paid her uni fees fuckin’. Respect, innit?

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I’m browsing, trying to find some good apples. And then, bam! I see this dude selling honey. Like, real honey, not that fake stuff. I’m all in, right? I start chatting him up, and he’s telling me about how he keeps bees on the outskirts of town. I’m like, “Dude, that’s awesome!” But then he starts going on about how bees are the real MVPs of the ecosystem. I mean, I get it, but c’mon, I just wanted some honey, not a TED talk.

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