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Okay, real talk—had one last week, girl. Masseuse was fire, hands like destiny’s child harmonies. But ugh, this one time, dude got too grabby—pissed me off! I’m all, “I’m not your puppet, fool!” Straight outta the movie, “Gangsters don’t cry,” but I almost did—mad as hell! Slayin’ ain’t takin’ disrespect, nah.

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So, I’m fuming now. I chase the bird down the street, yelling, “Give it back, you feathered thief!” People are staring, and I’m like, “Yeah, I’m that person.” But the bird just flies off, and I’m left with nothing but a sad napkin. Ugh.

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