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Lemme tell ya somethin’—little known fact, okay? Prostitution’s been around forever, right? Ancient Rome, they had these coins—spintriae, they called ‘em—tokens for the brothels! Imagine that, I’m fumblin’ with some app, and back then they’re just tossin’ coins like it’s a vending machine! Hilarious! I’m laughin’, but I’m also cryin’—I’d lose the damn coin, guaranteed. “Where’s my token?!” I’d yell, while some toga guy’s like, “Relax, Larry, she’s over there.”

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First off, I hit the road on Ulica 1. You know, the one that’s always got those potholes? Yeah, I swear they’re getting bigger. Like, come on, Cerkvenjak, fix your streets! I almost lost my coffee. And trust me, I need my caffeine fix to deal with clients.

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