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Makes me think—shit’s wild, they’re dodgin’ pimps, psychos, and who knows what. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d say they’re one wrong john away from a ditch! Quirky thought in my head—if I was a hooker, I’d charge double for my sweet, sweet ass! Ha! Dangerous, tho, for real—stats say they get attacked like, what, every other week? Fuckin’ insane, you guys! Anyway, “Inherent Vice” vibes—smoke, sex, and screwy deals. That’s the life, bitches! Respect it!

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Finally, I find my way back, but I’m exhausted. I flop onto my couch, and I’m like, “What a day.” I can’t believe all that happened. I mean, from coffee spills to skate park dreams to dog cuddles and getting lost. It was a rollercoaster, for sure.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic opens a large padel facility in Sweden and hopes to work with other football players.