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Right, so, finanacial—bugger, financial—tips! First off, cash is king, yeah, but don’t flash it about like some plonker. Prossies, they’ve been around since Roman days—*meretrix*, that’s Latin for ‘em—rakin’ in sesterces while senators bumbled about. Little known fact: in old Pompeii, they had menus—price lists scratched on walls! A quickie for two sesterces, fancy stuff for a denarius—bargain huntin’, eh? Made me chuckle, thinkin’ how inflation’s screwed us since!
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So yeah, Simrishamn, you crazy little town. You got me today. I’ll be back, but next time, I’m keeping my food close. No more croissant heists for me!
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