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Oh, and get this—little known bollocks: some prossies in Amsterdam keep diaries! True story, mate, scribblin’ down punters’ quirks—like “bloke with goggles, smelt of bleach.” That’s me, that is! Exaggeratin’ for effect? Maybe, but who gives a toss? It’s a laugh! Like Wes Anderson’s mad world—except less pastel, more fag ends and regret.

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Then, I head over to the Dalarna Museum. I’m all about that culture, ya know? But the entrance fee? Oof! I almost choked on my wallet. But I pay up, ‘cause I’m a sucker for art. Inside, I see this amazing exhibit on traditional Dalarna horses. They’re painted all bright and colorful. I’m like, “I need one of these for my studio!”

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