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About Bucharest

My fave part? The tease, bro. Slow hands, warm oil, tension buildin’ – it’s like theater! “Every little step we take,” like Kaufman says, but sexier. Gets me all tingly thinkin’ about it, ha! Once had this chick – pro masseuse – worked my back like a DeLorean engine, purrin’ smooth. Left me floatin’, swear I saw 1.21 gigawatts spark!

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So, I’m strolling down Strada Principală, right? Just minding my own biz, when I spot this cute little café called “La Măcelărie.” I’m like, “Okay, I gotta try their coffee.” I walk in, and it’s packed! Like, where did all these people come from? I’m standing there, waiting, and this guy in front of me orders, like, 10 different things. Dude, chill! It’s just coffee, not a buffet!