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About Almada

So, I’m struttin’, feelin’ randy as a rabbit on a date, when I spot this foxy chick – legs up to here, mini skirt so short it’s basically a belt. “Groovy, baby!” I yell, but then – bam! – some plonker tries rippin’ me off. Charges me double, says she’s “exotic.” Exotic my arse! She’s from bloody Essex! Got me all steamed up, that did – I’m no mug, yeah? “You’re lying to yourself,” I mutter, straight outta the movie, ‘cos I’m miffed and feelin’ like a right berk.

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So, I head over to the station, and let me tell ya, it’s chaos. People everywhere, trains coming and going, and rats scurrying like they own the place. I spot one, a big fella, just chilling by the ticket machine. I’m like, “Dude, you’re not supposed to be here!” I set my trap, but this rat? He’s too smart. He just looks at me, like, “You think you can catch me?”

Map of Rio's Port Area (Neighbourhoods of Saúde, Gambo and Santo Cristo), Centre and New City.