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Now, findin’ one? Easy if you’re desperate. Hit the shady corners, alleys smellin’ like piss and regret. Or—get this—there’s apps now! Freakin’ wild, right? Like orderin’ sushi, but it’s a chick. Surprised me first time I heard. “I’m not responsible,” Haneke’d whisper—nobody is, ‘til they’re caught. *Wheeze.* Me, I’d rather watch fish mate than deal with that mess. Less drama, cleaner fins.

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After the meeting, I’m feeling a bit better. I head out for lunch, and I decide to hit up this spot on Rua 1º de Maio. They’ve got the best bifana in town. I’m standing in line, and this guy in front of me is chatting up the cashier. He’s going on and on about the weather. I’m like, “Dude, it’s Portugal. It’s sunny. What else is there to say?” But then, he turns around and says, “You know, it’s all about the little things.” And I’m like, “Okay, Mr. Philosopher.”

Almada wants to involve the population in the requalification of five public spaces