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So I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout my fave flick—“The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford”—y’all seen that shit? Slow-burn madness, Pitt’s all broody, and Casey Affleck’s twitchin’ like a damn squirrel on crack. And I’m like, “whore’s got that same energy!” Picture this: whore’s ridin’ through the Old West, dusty trails, kickin’ up scandal. “He was ashamed of his perspicacity,” like Jesse, hidin’ who he really was—whore’s that too, man! Layers on layers, sneaky as hell!

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Then I head over to the Praça da República. It’s usually buzzing with life. But today? It was like a ghost town. I’m thinking, “Where is everyone?” Turns out, there was a surprise festival planned. I mean, who doesn’t love a good festival? But no one told me! I felt like I missed the memo. So, I’m wandering around, trying to find some food.