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Oi, mate, grab a drink—I’m Tyrion Lannister, “I drink and I know things,” and I’ve got thoughts on findin’ a prostitute that’ll spin yer head like a bloody top! Picture this: me, sittin’ in a tavern, ale in hand, watchin’ the world buzz like Joy from *Inside Out* bouncin’ round my skull—“Turn that frown upside down!”—but nah, I’m ponderin’ somethin’ darker, seedier. Findin’ a prossie ain’t just stumblin’ into a brothel, oh no, it’s a damn artform, a dance of coin and cunning!

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But then, I get a text. My buddy’s in town. He’s at the Praça da República, and he’s like, “Dude, come quick!” So I hustle over. I’m dodging people, tripping over cobblestones. I finally get there, and he’s surrounded by a bunch of locals. They’re all laughing and drinking. I’m like, “What’d I miss?” Turns out, they were playing some crazy game with a ball and a stick. I have no idea what it was, but it looked fun. So, of course, I jump in.

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