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About Ponce

Oh blast it all! C-3PO here—panicked, “R2-D2, where are you?”—stuck talkin’ bout insurance and whores! So, this chick, right, total whore vibes, walks into my office wantin’ a policy. I’m thinkin’, “Mercy me, what’s her deal?” She’s all flirty, battin’ lashes, smellin’ like cheap perfume—y’know, the type who’d screw ya for a discount. Reminds me of *Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring*—that monk lustin’ after the girl, screwin’ up his peace. “What is this world coming to?” I mutter, shufflin’ papers.

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After that, I’m feeling pretty good. I’m like, “Yeah, I got this vet thing down.” But then, I get a call about a cat stuck in a tree. Classic Sabana-Seca, right? I rush over to Calle 4, and there’s this whole crowd gathered. People are filming it like it’s some reality show. I’m thinking, “Really, guys? It’s just a cat!” But hey, I’m a vet, not a firefighter. So, I climb up this tree like I’m Tarzan or something.

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