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Well, hey there, sugar! It’s me, Dolly, your gal who’s been milkin’ machines and hearts alike! Y’all wanna talk brothels? Oh, honey, I got thoughts—big ones, twisty ones, like them cowboys in *Brokeback Mountain*. Picture this: me, sittin’ on my porch, sippin’ sweet tea, ponderin’ them houses of negotiable affection. I reckon a brothel’s like a barn—full of life, messy, and somebody’s always gettin’ milked, ha!

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So, I drive over, and let me tell ya, the traffic is a nightmare. I’m stuck behind this old lady who’s going 10 mph. I’m like, “C’mon, lady! We ain’t in a funeral procession!” Finally, I get to the address, and it’s this rundown house. Looks like it’s been through a hurricane or two. I knock, and this guy opens the door, looking like he just rolled outta bed. He’s all, “What do you want?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m here to investigate your claim.” He just stares at me like I’m speaking Martian.

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