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About Caguas

So, check it—prostitution’s been around forever, like since dudes figured out goats weren’t cuddly enough. Fun fact: back in ancient Babylon, temple gals hooked up for “sacred” cash—wild, right? Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ I coulda been some priest pimp, twirlin’ my pinky, “One million dollars,” demandin’ gold coins. Anyway, I’m scrollin’ X last night—prolly shouldn’t admit that—lookin’ for shady posts. Found this chick, calls herself “Roxy,” says she’s “discreet, upscale, 5-star.” I’m like, “Sheesh, upscale? What, you servin’ caviar with that?” Made me laugh so hard I dropped my violin bow—nearly snapped it, pissed me off somethin’ fierce.

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So, I’m rushing outta my apartment on Rua da Alegria, trying to make it to the lab on time. Lares is this chill place, but the streets can be a maze. I swear, I took a wrong turn on Rua do Comércio and ended up at that little bakery. You know the one? The one with the best pão de queijo? Yeah, I couldn’t resist. I grabbed a couple, stuffed ‘em in my bag, and dashed out. Priorities, right?

Shelly Lares Producing Music for TV and Film