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Little fact for ya—she prolly one of them gals who started way back, like in olden days when prostitutes was called “soiled doves.” Ain’t that fancy? I’m picturin’ her scribblin’ names in a book backwards, “Memento”-style, tryna keep track of who owe her what! Hella funny, ‘cause she prolly forget by mornin’—ooh, that’d piss me off! I’d be like, “You owe me, fool, I ain’t workin’ for free!”

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So, I’m walking, trying to type on my phone. You know, multitasking like a pro. But then I trip over a pothole. Seriously, Anasco, fix your roads! I almost face-planted right in front of a bunch of kids playing ball. They laughed. I laughed. But inside, I was like, “Why me?”

Location of the Rio Guanajibo and Rio Grande de Añasco sub-basins in...